Future Talent Awards

Who doesn’t love a cheeky one liner? It’s all a bit of pun at the end of the day (sorry, that was a really weak effort) and in the love of all things in the art world, Edinburgh Festival Fringe has been underway since the beginning of August and is almost at a close. From entertainment, right through to fine art, this festival set in the heart of Scotland is one of the biggest celebrations in the world and it rewards our capeless heroes for their exquisite work in the creative industry.

Now, a certain award is given out at this ceremonial occasion and this is in fact, the best joke from the event over the three weeks. Sponsored and selected by the renowned channel Dave, the top ten hilarities are chosen, and this year they included laughs about clowns, Kim Kardashian and even Jesus, and the list went a little something like this…

10. Grace The Child – “They’re always telling me to live my dreams. But I don’t want to be naked in an exam I haven’t revised for…”

9. Simon Munnery – “Clowns divorce. Custardy battle”

8. Alun Cochrane – “The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper. She was wearing massive gloves”

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7. Tom Parry – “Red sky at night. Shepherd’s delight. Blue sky at night. Day”

6. Mark Nelson – “Jesus fed 5,000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread. That’s not a miracle. That’s tapas”

5. Dave Green – “If I could take just one thing to a desert island I probably wouldn’t go”

4. Masai Graham – “What’s the difference between a ‘hippo’ and a ‘Zippo’? One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter”

3. Adam Hess – “Surely every car is a people carrier?”

2. Stewart Francis – “Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse … but enough about Kanye West”

1. Darren Walsh – “I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It’s Hans free”

So, there you have it! Darren Walsh was crowned champion of this face off with his playful phone pun about Germans. Personally my favourite is the one about the hippo and the zippo, simply because the others have no spark (another weak effort). Do you think you can come up with any better? Why not challenge someone with your one liners to see if you can really cut it as a comedic genius?

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