Future Talent Awards

How many times have you been scrolling down your feed and contemplating why you’re even still friends with certain people? With 1 billion users on Facebook, it’s more than likely that you’re going to come across one or two posts that will leave you with clenched fists and smacking away angrily at your keypad forming a well written witty reply.

Use these annoying attributes as a check-list if you’re wanting to filter your Facebook.

Quiz Results

Of course what we all want our walls spammed with is what type of girlfriend Jessica really is or how many Star Wars characters Adam can guess correctly. These results don’t actually determine what your personality is like, so can someone please put a warning up to all 20-some-things to STOP and go outside to meet other actual people who will give you the attention you oh so obviously crave.

Daily Relationship Status’

Abodus - Live until 29th Sep 24

Okay, we all are fully aware of your new two week relationship but updating your status every five minutes with how much you “love your bae” won’t convince us, any more than it’s failing to convince you, that this relationship is going to last. Instead of posing for the perfect “morning in bed with this one” photo, why don’t you put your phone down and try to talk through your issues.

Posting Assignment Grades

When receiving your grades you shouldn’t have to compare yourself to every other person in the country unless you personally ask. Nothing makes you more worried as a student than finding out people in your class passed with a high 2:1 when you barely scraped a 2:2. Come results day now and everybody and their brother are writing status’ of what they have achieved. Not that I’m saying people shouldn’t be proud, but why does everyone want 500 strangers to know? Just tell your Mum and have done with it.

Game Requests 

Does anything need to be said about this any more. Apparently as a community Facebook users have come to the decision that Farmville is the devil. Play these games all you like but please don’t send notifications at three in the morning asking for extra sod or for me to tend to your chickens. Our friendship will be in jeopardy…

“Repost This or a Loved One Will Die”

If you have fallen for these in the past then frankly hang your head in shame. These posts are about as much use as swearing on someone’s life in order to prove you have or haven’t done something. There’s nothing entertaining about using how much you care for your family in order to ‘get likes’, but at the same time, don’t be so gullible to believe that you can save someone’s life through a post robbed from Tumblr.

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