Future Talent Awards

5 Things Every Student Does | The Student Pocket Guide
by Laura Beecroft

There are many trademark survival habits that students pick up in a relatively short space of time: sleeping, drinking, lack of cleanliness, spending money you barely have, etc. I could go on forever but you get the picture! Here’s a more succinct anatomy of a student, by a student. You know you’re a student too when…


… You open the fridge more times than you open your text book.

You started the semester with a whole host of good intentions to study harder than ever before, starting by spending a small fortune investing in every book on the reading list. One month later and the text books remain on the bookshelf gathering dust. Your fridge door on the other hand sees much more action; checking for food you know jolly well you don’t have!

… You find yourself scrapping over the last reduced lasagne at the supermarket.

You set off to the shop 10 minutes before it closes to seek out the poor chap who is responsible for marking down the prices. You then stalk him, grabbing anything and everything that’s cut price in the hope that a) it can be frozen and b) it will make a Nigella style banquet.

Abodus - Live until 29th Sep 24

…  You order a takeaway pizza to be delivered to the library at some unearthly hour.

Deadline day is approaching and you find yourself in the library on an all-nighter. The only thing that could possibly get you through this ordeal is ordering a takeaway. Not only will this buy you some time away from completing your assignments but it will also make those who do actually want to study green with envy.

… You eat from plastic plates with plastic cutlery to save time on washing up.

Cooking a meal for yourself is one thing, but cleaning up after such a trial is another thing completely.  Eating from plastic or paper plates is the only solution! Eat and throw; no mess and no cleaning required. This frees up time for other important activities, for instance watching TV or checking Facebook. It also means you’ll save money on washing up liquid – a no brainer when you put it like that.

… You only realise how much you love living alone when you move home for the summer break.

You moan all term time about having to cook and clean for yourself until you return to home comforts for the summer. After the first Sunday dinner and hour long bath the novelty wears off. Suddenly living alone is more appealing than pegging your Dad’s undies out and washing the endless piles of dishes every single day. You’ve done enough of that at uni; summer should be your time off from such responsibilities!

Laura Beecroft is an English Language student at Northumbria University. She blogs for GKBC in order to gain writing experience and defend her student lifestyle