A hair-raisingly good article by Jack Shannon.
Hair. We all have it. But when you’re a broke student, paying good money for a haircut, when it’s just going to grow back seems like a waste of hard earned student loan. Money that you could have spent on beer. Or books. Whatever, we don’t judge. Well never fear, SPG is here with the low-down on the various different hair options available to both sexes.
BLOKES – Save money on razor blades by growing your very own beard! Think of it like a hairy pot plant.
THE SOUL PATCH
A swinging piece of 70’s nostalgia on your face.
Looks good on: Miley Cyrus’s Dad, musicians, Miley Cyrus.
THE GAME OF BEARDS
A Big bushy beard you could lose a badger in. This beard is the easiest to grow. Just let time and nature take its course.
Looks good on: George RR Martin, Brian Blessed, Hipsters.
THE ONE BEARD TO RULE THEM ALL
Game of Beards if it’s not trimmed and shampooed.
Looks good on: Gandalf The Grey, Gandalf The White, the homeless.
THE GCSE
So called because this scraggly buff-fluff belongs on a schoolboy than a sophisticated student. Some faces just don’t suit beards. Sorry.
Looks good on: No-one.
LADIES
THE JUDGE DREDDLOCK
Stick it to the establishment by rolling lumps of your hair in beeswax and knitting your own organic hemp hair-net. Just make sure to cut them off after graduation.
THE JOSEPH
As of, Coat Of Many Colours fame. If you’re going to dye your hair, make sure to do the roots as well.
THE TOILET DUCK WOW!
Your hair looks great! Bright pink or blue! It looks cool as hell! However, it does look like your hair has some pretty weird cleaning products growing out of the top of your face. Sorry.
THE I-CUT-THIS-MYSELF
What you think it says: I cut my own hair to express my individuality. What it actually says: I’m broke.
