Sitting next to you when there are loads of empty spaces

Whenever someone gets on, you always hope they won’t sit next to you and it’s a relief when you’re safe in the knowledge that there are plenty of spaces around you for someone else to choose from. So, when you suddenly find yourself with an unwanted companion, the journey is somewhat ruined and you spend the rest of it cursing them internally.

Not moving when you need to get off

You know your stop is coming up, and you also know that the person next to you has only just sat down. What are the chances that they’re only going one stop, then getting off too? Slim. This means social interaction. Once, this happened to me, and the man had a guide dog with him. Was he blind? Was he deaf? Would he hear me ask him politely to move so I could get up? I just didn’t know. But to my relief, I asked him, and he moved. Crisis averted.

However, another time, a girl around my age was sat beside me and I needed to get off, so I started to stand up so she knew I was leaving, and she just stared at me. I said, ‘Excuse me, please’ and she continued to stare. Even her friend, who was sitting nearby told her to get up, but no, she ignored us both and stayed put. To add to this, she had a HUGE gym bag with her which I had to awkwardly climb over in order to get out.

Playing music really loud

Whether you’re on the bus, train or tram, this is annoying. Headphones and earphones are made so that only you can hear the music. When someone decides to turn the volume up so high that we can all hear the beat of the tune, it is annoying and distracting (particularly if it’s heavy metal). It also makes me worry how their sense of hearing will be affected.

Talking so loud everyone can hear the conversation

This seems to happen when I am trying to read a book. I’ll manage to choose the one seat in front of the two people who a) like the sound of their own voices b) have a lot to complain about and c) somehow have the ability to breathe through their ears. I don’t know how they do it, but they keep talking and talking, getting louder and louder with no regard for anyone else. In the end, I have to put my book away.

Parents with uncontrollable children

What’s worse than loud, annoying adults? Loud, annoying children with parents who don’t make any effort to try and calm them down. They might have just had their fix of sweets and be ‘spinning out’ as my mum would say. Or, they might be about to have a tantrum or already be in the throes of one with no chance of quietening down anytime soon. Add a crying baby into the mix and it’s enough to send you crazy.

Drunk & Disorderly

You can hear them, you can smell them, and you hope they don’t come near you or talk to you. The journey would be made a whole lot more pleasant if they’d have got a taxi instead. Funnily enough, my sister has a photograph of a drunken idiot who had been taped to a pub chair and then put on a bus by his mates. The driver doesn’t look impressed, and the idiot looks, well…like an idiot. That very same idiot, ladies and gentleman, is my future brother-in-law.

Label sticking out

Okay, so this isn’t technically what someone does, but it is annoying. Someone is sat in front of you and the label on their jumper/coat/t-shirt is sticking out at the neck…once you’ve spotted it you can’t take your eyes away. All you want to do is fix it, but you can’t. All you can do is hope they get off at the next stop.

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