There are a lot of things that girlfriends don’t want their boyfriends to know, but hold on tight boys because your about to be exposed to some of the secrets of girl world. Know in advance that before you start this journey of self-discovery (through her eyes at least) it is not for the faint hearted, but it is about time you found out!
She hates that you can’t take a hint
This is one of a girlfriend’s biggest difficulties. We’re not trying to be difficult, we’re merely trying to make you feel like you’re in charge. See, we really do have hearts of gold, so when we say: ‘or we could stay in a watch a movie’ this really means, I look rubbish and am not getting out of bed, I just want to eat over 1000 calories and cover it all in cheese.
You’re really messy
Girls hate to feel like they’re nagging their other halves, but the 10th time she has to pick your socks up or make your bed, should definitely be the last. If at any point she says to you ‘are those your socks on the floor?’ do us a favour and take the hint! This is one of our biggest pet peeves, at the end of the day we’re your girlfriends, not your mothers.
You have a split personality
One of the hardest things to explain to a boyfriend is that acting one way with you and then completely different when around the ‘lads’ is not okay. We’re not completely horrible human beings, we understand that this may not be intentional, just remember that we’re dating the ‘real you’ and not your hyped-up ‘laddy’ persona. At the end of the day it really is key to just be yourself.
I know you don’t listen to what I’m saying
We know that even if you start by meaning to pay attention, after about 5 minutes of us trying to explain something we will see the notorious glaze of boredom possess you. Although we know you may not be interested in how my day went, you were the one who asked, so your follow through would be much appreciated. It’s okay you may have a short attention span, but we have a short temper to match it.
You’re way too rough
In case you hadn’t realised we are your girlfriends and not your wrestling-loving mates. We’re not lads; in fact, we’re humans who have feelings and a pulse, please stop trying to bruise us. This includes laying on our hair. We hate that. Although cuddling is romantic, scalping me is not. Please be delicate with us and make sure our golden locks are safely tucked away, otherwise there will be hell to pay! And on that note… we do not appreciate you driving with the windows down, especially when I took this long getting ready for a reason, if I wanted the windswept look I would have done it myself!
Me and my friends talk about you a lot
When you see us disappear on a night out or on the day we met, the chances are we snuck off to the bathroom to talk about you. Before you think the worst, this is not always a bad thing. The truth is, your fate was decided weeks ago when me and the girls talked about it and they approved you as one of my life decisions. On behalf of all us ladies, you’re welcome.
It’s the little things that matter
Chivalry is the key thing. Materialistic stuff doesn’t matter; we just want to know that you like us. Your comments can literally change everything. If you so much as hesitate when I ask your opinion on the cute dress I just bought, I will think you hate it forever and this will ruin my initial happiness of buying it in the first place! Likelihood is that’s why I brought you an ugly jumper for Christmas – now we’re even!
You don’t understand how we get ready
The way a girl gets ready is like a holy trinity for the recipe of our happiness. It’s usually made up of three main steps: 1. Get the right outfit, 2. Listen to music loudly! 3. Wine. Although you might think this process is silly, it is not. It is sacred to us. Please don’t rush us, especially for girls who live with each other, as this will take 5x as long for every girl involved. We get a lot of stick for this, but it’s an enjoyable process, and is half the fun of going out. I’m talking face masks, bubble bath, do your hair, call your friends. We’re warning you now, do not watch us when we’re putting our tights on, you do not need to see me squeeze and wriggle my sausage legs into their casings! On the same line, yes we pull funny faces when we do our make-up. Deal with it. You’re not supposed to see this process and neither is humanity!
You may be shocked by our confessions and whilst these may not apply to you all, they may save your relationship one day, or at the worst buy you some extra time. We don’t dispute that we can be complex at times, but once you understand how we think you’ll be fitter for survival!