Long Distance relationships are tricky – I would know, I’ve been in one for two years now.
And not only are they tricky, but apparently every man and his dog knows just a little bit more than you do. How do you know? Because they’ll tell you.
Each time I meet someone new and they hear that I, living in Los Angeles, have a boyfriend living in Sydney, Australia, I so luckily get their very personal, very ‘expert’ opinion on what I should and shouldn’t do.
The Frat guys tell me I’m crazy – “College is all about experimenting! Do you even have any fun? Why bother go out at all?”
Other girls look at me confused – “But, like, is it even worth it? There’s cute guys everywhere, why settle for one?”
Adults preach their timely wisdom – “You’re far too young for that! God, I would never do that, if I were you!”
“If I were you” – the dreaded words that completely undermine that fact that they are not you.
As someone who chooses to stay in a long-distance relationship, and is proud of that commitment, let me give it to you straight – especially if you’re considering taking the risk;
- Time zones suck. No matter whether it’s three hours or seventeen hours, your days and nights will no longer align, and that’s a challenge that the two of you will have to work through – together.
- Some days are harder than others. One day you will be fine, out with friends, occupied and loving your life exactly as it is – other days you’ll notice every couple that exists and wonder why oh why it had to be you that couldn’t be with your significant other. Take each day as it comes, and give yourself whatever emotional forgiveness you need.
- Saying goodbye never gets easier. Never. It’s up to you to know whether or not saying hello again is worth the goodbye that will inevitably come.
- They’re right – you’re only young once. University/College is the perfect time to explore and experiment with yourself and what you want out of life. If you choose to be with someone, you must be 100% sure that this person will encourage you to go out, trust you with people of all genders and ages, and genuinely want you to be busy during your days rather than talking to them 24/7. But – you must be that person in return.
- You are you and that person is a (very important) part of you. But before you commit to distance and time, you must know who you are and what you want in order to ensure that you never sacrifice authenticity for convenience.
I cannot tell you whether committing to long-distance at any time, especially during college or university – is something you should do. Nobody can – it’s completely individual.
What I can tell you, however, is that it is a commitment.
It is possible, and it can be worth it.
Above all else, ignore what they say. It isn’t their heart on the line – it’s yours.