Derwent Living

As students and young people, you’re more than likely at a stage in your life where you’re looking to find that special someone and begin building a life together. But if there’s one thing many of us fail to recognise in a potential mate, it’s their narcissistic personality traits. That’s right, you could be dating a narcissist, and that’s not the sort of person you’ll want to spend your life with, trust me.

So what is a narcissist? Well, it can fall into the category of mental disorders, but sometimes, a narcissist just isn’t a very nice person. People who are narcissistic often believe they are above everyone else, are incredibly self-centered, and will unlikely admit to any wrong doings on their side. They appear to lack empathy, but behind this confident, “I don’t care about your feelings’ attitude, is a very fragile person who’s self-esteem could shatter at the slightest criticism.

So, do you think you’re dating one? Here are five signs to watch out for…

They love talking about themselves 

They’re obsessed with their own achievements, and pretty much the sound of their own voice. Their favourite topics of conversation revolve around their own personal issues and challenges, but I doubt they’ll take much interest in yours. They love to brag, and it seems they can’t fault themselves in any way or admit to negative traits they possess… Sound familiar?

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They feel entitled

They expect the world from you, they want you to act and behave in a way that’s beneficial to them. They think they’re entitled to you and expect you to be perfect for them 24/7. They probably¬†don’t respect you on the days you’re feeling a little down and they can’t understand why you aren’t making the effort to be the way they want you to be all day every day. Good partners are there for you on the good days, and the bad days.

The master manipulator 

They love to manipulate your feelings; tricking you into believing you’re being irrational when they upset you. Like I said, they won’t accept responsibility for upsetting you, instead, they’ll disregard your feelings and pass you off as a cry-baby or too sensitive. In a strong relationship, your partner should apologise for any upset they cause you; it’s just standard relationship guidelines, right?

They can’t handle rejection

This is a nasty one, unfortunately, they suffer from some deep-seated self-esteem issues which they refuse to admit to. If you can’t give them what they want, the way they want it; they’ll make it a personal attack on you. This will come in the form of ridicules, blame, guilt tripping, and claiming you’re ungrateful or selfish. They’ll play the victim, and possibly give you the dreaded cold shoulder…

They’re charmers

They’re attractive, alluring, and will love you unconditionally – but not in the right way. Think of them as a great salesman; they can win you over, and will sweep you off your feet in order to get what they want. And one day, they’ll likely hold it against you claiming they “give you everything” and you take it for granted… They’re incredibly talented when it comes to tricking you into feeling a certain way.

Written by Clo Gascoigne